What's wrong with me?

Hope you don't mind if I use this space to try to figure out what in the hell is going on with me.  Lately I've just not been myself.  I've been listless, depressed, and not wanting to do much of anything at all.  Strange thing is, I can't really think of a single reason as to why I've been feeling like this.

If I had to pinpoint when this feeling started, I'd have to say about three weeks to a month ago.  That leads me to the point where I started to see this new pain doctor, Dr. Somerville.  Dr. Somerville, while a great guy, I think has too many patients and has found a way to dissociate himself from listening to their problems. When I visited his office, I was initially suspicious of the sheer number of patients in his office.  I waited until after 1pm to see him when my appointment was fo 9 am!!  I knew when I first went to see him that there was a problem simply judging by what he prescribed me upon sending me home....He increased my narcotics by at least 60% over what they were at previously.  At that time, he also virtually insisted on having me do some sort of procedure on my back, and when he did that I sort of put my foot down.  He stated that his only rule was that I had to do what he prescribed, and that I would feel better by following his regime.  For that reason and that reason alone, I agreed to have some simple facet injections done on my back.

The month following my appointment with him I started feeling like this...all draggy, and with a serious lack of interest in things.  Unfotunately this was around Christmas time.  I missed out on a lot of the joys of the season this year because of this feeling.  I finally decided that the reason for it was the increase in dilaudid.  Previously, I think that the best that I've felt since I was orignally hurt was the few months before that, when I was on the fentanyl patch using dilaudid for breakthrough pain.  I shouldn't have even needed the change, but for some reason every doctor needs an ego stroke or something and just cannot stand to keep his/her client on the same medications, no matter how well they are working for the client.  It's really maddening!

Well, I thought this was going to help me sort myself out, but I don't think that it's really made any difference.  I have no new insights on this subject, which means that tomorrow when I walk in to that appt, things could very well hit the fan.  Whatever happens though, wish me luck.  I need to start feeling like a human being again.